Silvana sin Lana Tuesday 8/2/16 #11


Jorge gets called away to deal with Marge, leaving Vicente to “fix” the broken hook and the hole in the wall, right? Except no, he doesn’t. He gets an eyeful of Majo changing her shirt and chants “turn around.” And thus this subplot heads into even skeevier territory.

Angie and Lupita come over and Jorge makes sure to drape himself all over Marge as soon as he realizes Angie’s there. Lupita goes upstairs, but Angie gets out of there as fast as she can.

Stella gets cozy in Manuel’s kitchen…and his pantry…she knows he’s soooo busy. Surely he needs a woman around! (Uh…but you work the same hours, so how are you less busy and therefore able to pick up his alleged slack?) At the very least, she’s staying until Lucha is better. Lucha unwittingly dooms herself by shouting from upstairs about her pain pills…and some lemonade…and the books she left downstairs.

Lupita and Pedrito are chatting in the living room about Lupita’s First Communion when Andres stops by to check on Lucía.

Chivis is making veggie soup. She’s getting sick of food out of boxes and cans. For once Trini says something positive–she’s proud of Chivis. Majo comes in, whining about the fishy-smelling clothes Chivis left in the bathroom. Chivis tells her to put them in the hamper…and quit using up all the hot water when she has a bath. Trini thinks that sounds sooooo middle-class. Lupita comes running in to announce that Andres is over at Lucía’s.

Lucía complains about wanting Andres to discharge her already…she’s going to have to make a run for it when his girlfriend finds out he’s there! Andres makes excuses for Majo. He notices the picture of Lucía’s mom and asks about her. She was apparently even more stubborn than Lucía, but sweeter. “And who says you’re not sweet?” Lucha thanks him for looking out for her and Vicente walks in to greet Andres. When Andres leaves, Vicente gives Lucha a hard time about him being there.

Andres has barely made it out the gate when he notices Majo by his car, waiting to confront him. Why? Because he went to see Lucía FIRST. He whines and pleads and she turns down dinner to stomp back inside without him. (Mr. 5ft: Let her go.)

Vicente thinks Andres has a crush on his sister, but she insists she’s not in the market for a rich guy who already has a girlfriend. Said girlfriend texts Vicente that she wants to dance all night.

In the van, he tries to turn it into a date, but has to get past their dietary differences and her annoyance with all things Andres. They agree on sushi.

Chivis gets a surprise visit from Stella. With soup. Being neighborly. As neighbors do. Once again, Chivis has no graceful way to refuse. And since she actually thinks it’s a good idea for her to learn how the fish market operates, even though she won’t be working there, it’s easy for Stella to pitch a 4am start tomorrow so she can be there when the trucks are unloaded. Stella’s braying about not knowing what to call Manuel anymore…boyfriend? Fiancée? Husband? Trini’s sure it’s not “husband” until she actually marries him. But anyway, Stella’s off and Chivis lets loose a “¡No la soporto!” Trini wonders why: because of Stella herself or because Chivis is jealous?

Stella sneaks upstairs to try to get in bed with Manuel. Unfortunately for her, Pedrito got there first. Stella freaks out quietly and leaves…but gets her robe caught in the door just in time for Lucha to bust her. Lucha’s disgusted at finding Stella sneaking out of her dad’s room in her risqué PJs (meh, they weren’t that bad) and the resulting discussion wakes Manuel. He explains to Lucha that nothing was going on (because, Pedrito) and pretty much dismisses Stella’s pouting over how Lucha just talked to her.


Angie gets to the club and while she has zero practical waitressing experience, Jorge said such nice things about her that Lorenzo is willing to give her a try. Tonight. Starting right now. Good thing they don’t have the music on yet because she calls Chivis and says that homework is going to be way more complicated than they thought and “Laura’s dad” will drive her home after…at 1am.

Angie seems to be settling into her new job…until Majo and Vicente show up. Neither of them notices Angie. They’re too busy desperately flirting or desperately pretending not to flirt, depending on which one you look at. Angie successfully avoids them and gets to watch Majo swigging booze and smooching Vicente.

Angie’s so distracted she ends up bumping into someone and spilling a tray of drinks. At least it was Lorenzo? She ducks behind the bar before Majo or Vicente can see her again.

At Stella’s house, Poncho pines. Again. Dom tries making the analogy that just because he has a thing for Ricky Martin doesn’t mean he can expect Ricky Martin to return his affections, right? Poncho’s not listening. He says his life has lost all meaning and rushes out of the house…

To go down to the salsa bar and drink. Majo and Vicente are still there. Majo’s ready to go home, but Vicente obliquely suggests…a hotel? She turns him down, he gets the check, and they leave. Angie sticks her head up from the other side of the bar, finally. Poncho cries into the bosoms of his dance partner about nobody loving him.


By the time Angie gets home, Chivis is dressed and ready for her date with Stella. She warns Angie she’s not to leave the house tomorrow (today?) and endures being called “Chichis” by Stella yet again, and then they’re off to the market.

At the fish market, the first stop is the food truck, where the owner has Stella’s chilaquiles ready for her. Stella orders some pancita y una chela for Chivis (um…did she just ask for tripe and a beer?!). Chivis doesn’t usually eat so early, but Stella talks her into it. Dom comes running up, panicking over Poncho’s continued absence.

Poncho wakes up in his dance partner’s bed with her three children staring at him.

Vicente wakes up late and jumps out of bed. He looks over at the wall and I’m thinking he’s going to succumb to the temptation of that stupid peephole, but instead he grabs his cell phone and texts Majo about her kisses.

Majo’s not exactly up for suggestive texts this early in the morning. Nor are she or Angie ready for Trini to come through ringing a bell and singing a “Get up and clean!” song. They both agree she’s a bit more…energetic since she started hanging out with Benito. Majo brings up Angie’s late night and doesn’t buy the “homework” story. Oh yeah, well, Angie doesn’t buy the “I was at a party with Andres” story either. “How long have you been cheating on him?”

Never mind how Angie found out she was kissing Andres at the salsa bar last night, she can’t deny it! Majo justifies her behavior with “It was only a few kisses.” And anyway, that’s just the way she is. Angie’s angry that Majo gave her that lecture the other day about Jorge being wrong for her. Lupita comes in, upset that they’re arguing again, then asks Majo if it’s because she fought with Andres. Majo shoves them both out of the room and slams the door.

This wakes up Jorge, who notices that Vicente has left and that stupid hook is out of the wall again. But was it Vicente? Or a bad repair job? Or the force of Majo slamming the door? He watches as she calls Vicente and freaks out over Angie finding out they kissed. Here’s her plan–he’s going to stop texting her and if anyone asks him, he’ll deny everything.

At the Gazebo of the Annoyed Virgen of the Fish Market, the Virgen is looking slightly less annoyed as Chivis rearranges her flowers. Dom arrives, asking her to pray with him because surely she must be closer to heaven. Chivis chides him for thinking that, but agrees they can pray together. He interrupts their praying to ask what she uses on her hands and she tells him to get back to it. Dom prays out loud that Poncho comes back safe and sound and suddenly, we see his motorcycle approaching!

Of course, Dom thinks it was all Chivis’ doing. He happily hugs Poncho and then smacks him for making them worry. Poncho greets Chivis and says she’s as lovely as her daughter…who he saw last night…at the salsa bar…with Vicente…but no worries because the two of them are obviously in love and going to end up together. So much for keeping things quiet.

Manuel scolds Stella for last night and she whines about everyone criticizing her all the time. Manuel tells her it’s because she’s impulsive. Stella points out her good behavior with Chivis and how Manuel doesn’t notice the good things she does. She’s snogging Manuel when Chivis comes in to let him know that Poncho finally showed up. Also, she’s planning to get a car so she won’t have to borrow his truck. And no, she doesn’t need help. And yes, Stella’s right, she does learn fast.

Andres pulls up in front of the duplex. Lucha is out on the balcony. She complains about being cooped up in the house. She says she’s joking about having her brother open the door downstairs for him…but is she? He gives her permission to cut class on Monday, but she’s sure she’ll be fine. She jokes about whether Majo would be bothered if he picked her up for class. I’m pretty sure that one was a joke. Andres heads in to see Majo and Lucha wonders what he could see in an airhead like that.

Manuel goes out to the floor to scold Poncho for showing up late. Poncho loudly tells the entire market about how he got lucky last night. For Stella’s benefit he says she was single, rich, with an ocean view apartment. Stella’s not buying his story of a romantic dinner, etc. and figures he got thrown out of the allegedly fancy restaurant for not being able to pay. Vicente comes into the stall, saying he was just in the bathroom, but Manuel assumes Vicente was also out late last night…? Poncho tells him not to worry about Vicente, clearly he’s got a serious thing going with the neighbor’s daughter.

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Author: 5ftLatina

Kat is 5ftLatina. She is really 5' tall (and probably shrinking) and Latina. She is not actually a cactus, but she is both prickly and cute. Mr. 5ft is actually married to Kat, but is not 5' tall or Latina. He is also not a form of plant life.