Lucas is highly amused when he finds out his brother was the creep on the boat that Vale whacked with her shoe. Carlos complains all he did was hire a masseuse…. “To come out to your boat?!” Lucas laughs again about the boat. Vale says Jessica needed a job, so she accepted, “and she doesn’t even know how to give massages!”
Oh, Carlos knows. He feels worse than he did yesterday, on top of his head hurting. So who the hell is Vale anyway? Lucas puts his arm around her and introduces her as his novia.
By the time Gabe and Jessica get close enough to see them, Lucas is signing the paperwork and Vale’s just standing there next to Carlos. Jessica freaks out and tells Gabe that’s the guy who tried to kill her last night! She leaps at him to defend Vale and Vale has to pull her back. Carlos demands to know who these locas are!
It goes from bad to worse as Jessica and Vale accuse him of trying to lure Jess to his boat under false pretenses. Carlos tells Lucas he liked Salma better. Them’s fightin’ words! Jess starts to come at him again and when Gabe holds her back, she threatens to tell his boss, which cracks Lucas up, and Carlos leaves before (I’m guessing) Jessica can find out he’s a legit rich guy. Which is pointless because almost as soon as he’s gone, Lucas is confirming that he IS the boss and Vale’s saying he’s Lucas’ brother and so Jess knows he’s the owner of Astilleras Zubizarreta. Lucas suggests they just have lunch already.
As soon as they get into the restaurant, Vale pulls Jessica aside so they can go to the bathroom. And gossip. Gabe has Lucas switch seats to avoid some photographers.
OK, Jess no longer thinks Carlos was trying to kill her, but she knows his intentions last night were NOT good ones. Vale is embarrassed now that this was her first contact with Lucas’ family and he already hates her. What if it’s like in a telenovela and he declares war on her? Jess agrees that he sure does seem dangerous
Back at the table, Gabe and Lucas can’t believe Carlos has been picking up chicks by pretending to be a boat captain. Lucas has no idea, but he wouldn’t put it past him, now that he’s retired. He thinks it’s pathetic. Gabe reminds him about the photographer and Lucas pretends to be turning to talk to an invisible person so they can get his good side.
Vale checks in with Tomás. She’s not getting quite the amount of gushing over him from Lucas that she’d like and Gabe has to explain that Lucas doesn’t really like kids. Oh, kids, sure, but he’d better like HER kid. If they’re going to be dating, he has to love Tomás like a son. Jessica shoots her a panicked look from across the table, but Vale just keeps going while Lucas takes a big sip of wine.
Lucas excuses himself to go to the bathroom and takes Gabe with him. Jessica tells her it’s only been two days! She can’t be throwing fatherhood on him already. Vale says she’s not going to hide things from him. He needs to know right away that she’s a package deal.
Oh, he gets that, and it’s exactly what’s freaking him out right now. There’s Vale, her son, her friend, his brother…he can’t even think about having a son without breaking out in hives! Gabe says it’s temporary. And it’s kind of funny.
It’s not to Lucas. Why is he going to take care of someone else’s kid when he doesn’t have any of his own? Salma never would have asked him to do that. “Yeah, but Salma’s not exactly the greatest mom.” On the other hand, Gabe thinks Vale’s quite a woman. Lucas is just so hung up on the kid thing all he can do is complain and itch. (I think according to telenovela rules, that means Lucas is Tomás’ father. Which sucks for Gabe.)
Jess is scarfing down everything on the table in an attempt to get as much of this good, expensive food while she can. She’s even considering asking for takeout. Vale, on the other hand, decided she’s starting a diet. (*groan*) Jess can’t do that. If she did she’d just get anxious and have to eat. Anyway, Vale needs to back off about Tomás before she scares Lucas away. First reel him in, then tell him about the package deal. (I think it’s a little late for that.)
Diego tries to get Felicitas to back of for a sec while he answers his phone, but she won’t and he takes the call anyway. So while Adriana is trying to ask him what’s up because Benicio thinks he has financial problems, her MOTHER is trying to undress him. She even undoes his zipper. OK, so pro tip for aspiring models IT DOES NOT WORK LIKE THIS! Someone tries this skeevy shit on you, you get the hell out!
I am not comfortable watching Diego stand there in his underwear while Felicitas prowls around him at her leisure. She mocks him for talking a lot and makes sure to remind him when it’s time for her to actually paint, he shouldn’t be wearing anything at all. Which she emphasizes by grabbing his ass. (I officially don’t care what Felicitas’ damage is or why she says Carlos is a creep, it doesn’t give her the right to treat people this way. I hope he talks to Adriana, gets an advance from someone who’s not trying to sexually assault him, and gives Feli her check back.)
Eloisa is carrying around that ID photo of maybe-Carlos and suddenly decides to ask Miriam to help her find somebody…an old love. Miriam’s confused. She thought Eloisa’s “old love” was Miguel and Diego’s dad and he’s dead. “Long story.” Anyway, can she find him? Miriam asks for his name “Carlos Lopez.” Ooh, that’s going to be tough with a name so common but ok, she’ll try. (Seriously? That’s it? You’re not going to ask about his hobbies or where he was living when she knew him or anything at all to help narrow it down? You’re just going to go looking for a Carlos Lopez in a haystack?)
Miriam finally gets around to asking the questions, but all Eloisa can tell her is he worked at a bank and it was over 20 years ago. “So you were cheating on your husband?!” That looks like a very guilty face Eloisa’s got there.
Diego gets back to the café and announces to Eloisa, Miguel, and Miriam that he has the money they need and they can go to the bank and make the transfer tomorrow. The café is saved! His boss, Adriana Zubizarreta, gave him an advance and they’ll take payments out of his paychecks. And now he’s going upstairs to celebrate. (And put out his fiery pants.)
Miriam’s a little suspicious. She checks things out with Miguel, but he’s willing to accept what Diego told them. Miriam just thinks it’s strange he would get an advance when he just started working there. She guesses she’s just being untrusting, but she hopes he’s not into anything raro (strange).
An offer he can’t refuse?
Salma meets the PI and gets right to the point–she wants to know the results of the DNA test before Gabe does. Yes, yes, confidentiality, blah blah blah. She’ll pay him very well and she won’t take “no” for an answer.
Well, he’s certainly going to try. And then Salma offers him double his fee. And he gulps.
Carlos drops the papers off at Adriana’s office, but she thinks he’s really there to complain about Lucas. Actually, he complains more about Vale. “Are they really dating?” Carlos has no idea. She has him come look at the picture of Lucas and Vale kissing on her computer and he says that’s the one. “Lucas is crazy!”
Adriana wonders if maybe he’s in love. You don’t always fall in love with the “right” person. Yes, well, Carlos hopes that won’t happen to Adriana. He hopes she falls in love with someone who’s a la altura de los circunstancias (up to the task).
Diego gets into the elevator with Oscar the Obnoxious. (Eh, I’ll work on it.) Benicio warns Adriana he’s on his way up, just to prove that he’s always looking out for her. In the elevator, Diego says Adriana must be unforgettable for him to keep coming back after she said she didn’t want to see him again. Doesn’t Oscar understand he’s out of the championship? Oscar scoffs that Diego’s the one who’s out of place. “Um, no. I work here.” Oscar warns him he should worry about keeping his job and not getting involved in his bosses’ private lives. Diego makes a face behind him and follows him out of the elevator.
Benicio offers to get rid of Oscar for her and Adriana’s willing to take him up on it, but she decides to go with him. Benicio’s brilliant solution is to assault her face with his face in front of Oscar. I’m not going to dignify that by calling it a kiss. And the annoying thing is, it works. On Oscar and Diego both. As disappointed as Diego is, he still makes sure to tell Oscar “I told you so.”
Benicio keeps the act up for Diego, who suddenly doesn’t need to talk to Adriana after all.
Back to work
Lucas, et al, get back to the studio to find Justin waiting for them. And Salma. And Agustin. Justin complains about Lucas treating this like a hobby when they’ve got scenes to shoot! Lucas says he’ll just go get touched up, which Justin complains is going to take two or three hours. Gabe shoves him in the direction of makeup and tells Jessica to go ahead and start working right away.
Alone in the hallway, Vale turns to Gabe and says Salma hates her. Oh, he agrees. She’s angry. But he likes Vale’s sincerity. He doesn’t think Lucas has ever had a woman like her in his life, but he thinks it might be best if she’s not quite so sincere with him. Like, the whole story about Tomás and her friend and all that, all the stuff she told Gabe. He’ll just get overwhelmed. He’s never liked the idea of fatherhood and he might just take off instead of confronting his fear. She should just…take it slow.
Vale thanks him. “Es usted mi ángel de la guarda.” “Eres mi ángel de la guarda,” he corrects. She should tutear him (address him informally). He’s not so old is he? Vale gives him a “Wellllll…” kind of look but no, she’s kidding. He laughs, but then he starts fussing with his face. (I am not used to having all the men be this obsessed with their looks. It’s a little disconcerting.)
On the set, Justin’s ready to shoot the scene. Salma grabs Lucas and kisses him and Agustin comes in with a gun and says he knew they were cheating on him. But Salma doesn’t break off the kiss. Vale starts getting steamed. And so does Justin. He calls “cut” and asks what just happened.
“I let myself get carried away.” is Salma’s excuse. Right, but see, Lucas is supposed to TRY to kiss her and she’s supposed to PUSH him away. He yells at Salma to have some respect!
Hints about the past
In her lair, Felicitas looks through a box of mementos and finds a letter to Carlos from Eloisa Romero. It’s old and it’s already open. I wonder who opened it.
She reads it now, mocking Eloisa for being so cursi talking about how her husband doesn’t deserve to be cheated on and she’ll always have the consolation of having a baby with Carlos’ face.
And then Carlos shows up with a bottle of champagne to celebrate her moving into a new studio. He jokingly asks if she’s really alone and apologizes to the imaginary “model” off hiding somewhere. Felicitas says she’s alone. He left her alone years ago. He pours the champagne and they toast. I do not understand this relationship.
Carlos toasts to the least loving, least sincere, least faithful couple in existence. Felicitas toasts to the worst husband who’s ever walked the earth. Still, they’re the ones celebrating, not just anyone! Felicitas agrees, it’s been difficult putting up with each other.
She decides to stop drinking since she’s been drinking all day and it makes her ask questions. Like “Why didn’t you ever divorce me?” Stupidity. Plus she never asked. And hey she sleeps with all her models…is she sure there’s no one here? She doesn’t think so. Hey, she’s gotta give him credit–she thought the first few times she cheated on him he’d get jealous, but nope, he didn’t even move a hair. “Please! If I moved a hair every time you cheated on me I’d be bald!” He toasts again.
Well, Felicitas still hopes he’ll have some kind of reaction every time she sleeps with someone. He tells her to give it up. Don’t expect anything from him. “Did you ever love me, Carlos?” He thinks so. A long time ago. A little. “Until Eloisa showed up.” (Dun, dun, dun!)
He doesn’t want to talk about Eloisa. But Felicitas sure does. What did she do to drive him wild? You know, so she can learn. No. She’s been drinking and he doesn’t like women who drink too much. “But you don’t even like me when I’m sober!” Hm, that’s true. She just wants to know what she has to do to get him to love her again. “Forget it.”
At the café, Miriam has a few possible Carloses, but one’s too old and the other’s too young. There’s one without a picture she wants to try emailing and Miriam tells her to go ahead. The last few days, thinking about the café closing made her realize she wants to see him again, even if it’s only once.
Vale pouts in Lucas’ dressing room while Jessica stress eats from a container of fruit that was in his fridge. Vale turns down a blueberry because she’s on a diet. (It’s ONE @#$%@#$%@ BLUEBERRY!)
Lucas gets back to the dressing room and glares at Jessica, asking if his coffee is ready. Vale hops up and says it’s nearly ready. They were just checking out the fruit to make sure it was still good. Jessica decides she’s got a ton of work to do over in the makeup room. Lucas thinks that sounds like a great idea. Wow, he does not like her.
Vale gives Lucas his coffee and some cookies. He thinks she’s acting weird, but she says it’s nothing. He keeps telling her to tell him and then she goes all Exorcist on him and screams “I DIDN’T LIKE WHAT SALMA DID!” (I’m really glad I wasn’t drinking anything! That was hilarious.) She calms herself down and he laughs. She’s jealous! Well, she guesses so. She’s not exactly used to having a boyfriend who’s an actor whose fan club she’s the president of.
He figures she hasn’t had a lot of boyfriends. Well, no, she’s been raising Tomás. He asks why, but she remembers Gabe’s advice and says it’s a long story and she doesn’t want to overwhelm him with it. Can they just look towards the future, please? And then she stands there looking miserable.
Adriana finds Gabe later while he’s fixing an emergency light and asks to talk to him about earlier. He congratulates her again, but he figures there’ll be no desempate (tie-breaker) now. He doesn’t think her boyfriend would like it. She says he’s not. They just did that to get rid of Oscar. Oh, because it looked like a pretty intense kiss. People probably think they’ve got something going on now.
So. Desempate? Adriana says she’ll think about it.
Good news for Lucas turns into work for everyone else
Vale runs lines with Lucas and he not only can’t remember them, he thinks it’s all “same diff” when he messes one up. Vale despairs.
Gabe interrupts with good news for Lucas. The magazine that has always refused to do a story on him now wants him on the cover. “Pink Lips!” Yep, the interview is tonight. Vale volunteers to go with them, but Lucas says she’s been working so hard lately…. Actually, Gabe forgot to mention that he gets the cover and a story IF Vale is with him.
Vale’s in shock. She collects that magazine! She’s been writing to them forever to get them to interview Lucas. Gabe says now she’s being interviewed too! Vale’s not thrilled about the pictures. She always blinks with the flash. Gabe says they can Photoshop it. Anyway, the interview is tonight at Lucas’ house, four wardrobe changes at least. Vale says there’s no way she can pull it off.
Lucas, who’s been on the verge of ripping his own throat out for several minutes, suggests Gabe take Vale to wardrobe and get her some outfits and they’ll have Jessica come do makeup. Vale thinks that’s so sweet of him. “It’s for me.”
Jessica, of course, has no problem going to Lucas’ house. She’d go every day. Even if she had a fever. Or was in a full-body cast. Or pregnant with twins. Gabe’s suddenly confused…is she pregnant with twins? “Do I look pregnant?”
So anyway, can she go? Of course she can! OK, then he’ll call Pink Lips and tell them they have a makeup artist. Pink Lips?! Oh, she’s dying! She’s dying! She flops into his arms and Gabe just laughs until she decides she’s alive enough to check out his arms through his jacket.
Carlos comes downstairs, typing on his phone and calling for Natalia, but she’s out of uniform and on her way to Lucas’. Yes, his brother Lucas. Is there another one? He asked her to come clean the house before his interview. “Dressed like that?” Hey, she might end up in the magazine, who knows, and she’s not going to do it in her uniform! He tells her not to get her hopes up. “Well, I’m off. Do you want a kiss? A hug? OK, then, I’m gone.” (HA!)
Carlos Lopez answered Miriam’s email. She doesn’t know if he’s the right Carlos Lopez, but he wants to see Eloisa tonight.
Gabe takes Vale to wardrobe and dumps a bunch of clothes into her arms. He tells her to try them on and show him. Like they’re in Pretty Woman and he’s Richard Gere and she’s Julia Roberts. She cracks up at the idea of him being Richard Gere. Well, he’s the sales person and she’s the buyer, WHAT EVER! Just get in there and start trying stuff on.
Outfit #1 is slinky and sexy and too “old fashioned” according to Gabe. Outfit #2 he declares “Marie Antoniette with her head still attached.” Outfit #3 is a fabulous homage to Carmen Miranda, but it’s no good for the interview. Vale thinks this one’s been the most “her” so far. Salma comes in to throw a temper tantrum about how she’s been begging Gabe to get her an interview in Pink Lips for years and he never did it.
“Hey, like your ex said, criticism and complaints in writing and signed, ok?” Salma stomps out angrily and bumps into Agustin on the way.
Strike…but definitely not striking out
At the end of the day, Adriana’s in a rush to get out of the office. Benicio was going to invite her out for Thai food, but she’s got this thing to go to. A personal thing.
It’s bowling! With Diego! She has her own ball. I’ve never seen a bowling bag that big. She’s got her own ball, her own shoes, her old bowling medal, her wrist brace. She’s been bowling since she was five. Now Diego starts looking nervous.
OK they were so close with Adriana and her bowling gear, but that white shirt. Nope. Nobody who’s bowled once would wear a white shirt bowling again. OK, they’ve got a lot of frames to bowl and they’re never going to get anywhere if it’s a 20-minute break for trash talk between every one. So far Adriana’s ahead with a strike and noooooooo wait! Diego only got 8 and he didn’t have a second throw and they’re both in the same lane. OK, I’m distracted now.
And I take it back, because on Adriana’s next throw she somehow slips and falls and Diego tries to grab her, but he ends up falling as well, and before they get up Benicio gets a picture. Which he sends to Carlos! And what’s Felicitas doing there?! At least he doesn’t show her the picture.
Natalia’s got the house looking spiffy and Lucas is dressed and ready. She gets her one chance to hit on him before the reporter and photographer show up. Oh, they are SO all about Vale. And she’s not here yet. It’s really her interview. Vale walks in wearing a hot pink print dress and the flashbulb starts going off. She wasn’t kidding about it making her blink.
Lucas tries to get control back and pulls Vale into the living room. He asks Jessica to give him a retouch. Gabe asks Natalia to bring in some refreshments. She stops to go congratulate Vale on snagging Lucas. Uff, that Salma’s not like they make her seem in the novela, amirite?! Lucas scolds Salma about doing what Gabe asked, but Vale says they just met! Give them a minute! She asks the photographer to get a picture of them.
Gabe grins gleefully at Lucas’ discomfort. Vale, Natalia, and Jessica are having a terrific time having their picture taken. Vale and Jessica show Natalia the Lucaslocas hand signal thing. I swear Lucas looks like he wants to cry.
Agustin comes over to Salma’s place, thinking she called him there for something romantic. Nope, she called him so he could find her lying on the couch with an open pill bottle on the coffee table.
Lucas is crap at interpreting hand signals. The interviewer asks if he and Vale are planning a wedding and Vale’s saying “no” but Lucas is saying “yes” while Gabe is frantically trying to wave him off. Somehow, from Gabe’s “back off, back off” he gets “five.” They’re planning a wedding in five days. Jessica jumps up and starts applauding, but no one can possibly be interpreting Vale’s facial expression as anything other than horror and panic.