¿Va a haber boda?
Halfway down the drive, Vale asks the driver to stop so she can get out and think about what she’s doing. Tomás and Jess’ opinions have, of course, been registered, ad inf.
Lucas has no idea what to tell the reporters…so he lies. Oh, look! Here’s a text from Vale saying she forgot the bouquet and she’s gone back for it. If anyone wants pictures please make sure to get his good side. And if there’s nothing else, he’d like to go back to being nervous about the wedding.
Salma’s having a great time with this…until Gabe points out the two sets of priests and judges and informs her one of them is real. She’s horrified–they have to get rid of the real ones! Lucas joins them. Gabe approves of his lie, but Salma snarks that it only works if Vale comes back. Lucas says she has to! She has to marry him! Gabe warns him to lower his voice with all the press crawling around.
Vale’s still thinking. Tomás tells her she doesn’t have to get married! Jess tells her she doesn’t have to run away! Vale thinks of all the times she sat and watched Lucas on TV…with Lucía, with the Lucas Locas. She comes to a decision, tells herself to CALM DOWN, and says they’re going. But where?
Miriam, Diego, and Eloisa hang out with Adriana and Carlos. Carlos gets Elo to come have a drink with him. Adriana encourages Miriam to have a look around, since she seems enthralled with the club. That leaves Diego and Adriana to have a meaningless conversation while they eat each other up with their eyes.
Lucas tries to get Gabe to call Vale and convince her to come back there and marry him, but she’s not answering her phone. Gabe assures him she could never leave him stranded at the altar. But…it’s a fake wedding, remember? Whatever. Lucas insists Vale has to come back!
Inside, Carlos says it’s kind of cool that Lucas is getting married. Yes, he knows it’s all fake. And wouldn’t it be nice if he and Eloisa were next? She’s confused–next for what? Next to get married! Theirs would be real, though. She just smiles awkwardly at him. (Was that supposed to be a proposal or not?)
Salma smarms to Lucas that she never would have done this to him. She’s sure Vale set the whole thing up–it was her idea after all. Lucas thinks he’s about to have a heart attack.
And then Natalia runs up and says Vale’s back! Gabe confirms it.
Eloisa hasn’t answered Carlos…and she doesn’t think this is the time or the place. Natalia interrupts them–the bride is back! They’d better take their places.
Gabe intercepts the real judge and asks him to hang out in a little side room here while the bride and groom have, uh, a hippie ceremony before the civil one. Incense and stuff. If he could just hang out for ten minutes, Gabe will come back for him. Gabe locks him in…just before Agustín comes down the hallway and sees him.
Tomás walks Vale down the aisle. Lucas shoves him toward the empty chair by Gabe and asks Vale what happened. Nothing. She had doubts. But she’s here. He tells her about the bouquet story and she agrees she’ll go with that if anyone asks.
The fake judge leads off with a very dramatic welcome. Then he accidentally refers to Lucas as “José Gerardo.” Oh, no, right, he’s marrying Lucas Duarte and La Fan. Cheers erupt.
Auggie walks in with the real judge, who says he’s the only one who can marry this couple. The president of the network sent him to perform this wedding. Vale has no problem with that until Lucas whispers that he’s the real judge! Oh! In that case…
Vale bursts into tears. She always imagined that on her wedding day, her friend Tito here would be the one who would perform the wedding! The camera scans the various facial expressions…Diego’s smirking. Jess looks suspicious. Lucas looks suspiciously innocent.
Jess takes advantage of the pause in the ceremony to blab about how she wants her and Diego’s wedding to be…after the twins are born, of course, or she’ll look like a giant meringue. (*roll eyes*)
OK, the real judge cedes his position to “Tito.” Lucas tells “Tito” to get on with it. Lucas says his “I do.” But does Vale? She stares at him like she’s expecting him to say something. And apparently “All you have to do is say yes,” wasn’t it. The judge asks the question again…and again Vale stares at Lucas as the cymbals roll. She finally says “yes!”
The judge declares them (fake) husband and (fake) wife and tells them to make with the smoochies. Eloisa bursts into a cheer that’s better left unrepeated. Lucas and Vale share a very fake stage kiss and then he gives her a very genuine smile.
Nicolas is back! Did he bust out of prison again? His face doesn’t say “no.”
But no, he didn’t. He’s out on parole. He can get on with his life as long as he checks in periodically. His lawyer came through for him. Nicolas says he’s been doing everything right–for Rodrigo. Because meeting Rodrigo changed his life. It made him another man. (*sob*)
Everyone wanders around, having some drinks and relaxing before the religious wedding. Carlos tells Tomás and Eloisa he’s sorry it wasn’t a real wedding–he’s sure Vale would have made his brother very happy.
Gabe pulls Tomás aside. Yeah, Tomás knows it’s fake, but he still wishes Vale hadn’t married Lucas.
Benicio calls to check on Miriam, pretending he’s just on a break from his meeting and he was thinking of her. She turns down a date tonight–the wedding might go late. He’s willing to wait as long as he has to.
Vale has to deal with Tomás’ grumpiness. She hopes when he’s older and he falls in love, he understands that you’ll do anything for a great love. And Lucas is her second great love, because her first one is Tomás.
Lucas and Gabe come over to get rid of the kid. They’ve got another problem…two priests, no waiting. Well, Vale refuses to have a fake wedding with a real priest. She thinks she can fix this.
Adriana checks in with Benicio. He claims he’s come down with what sounds like the flu. Adriana’s so terribly disappointed. She hopes he gets better soon. Natalia wonders why Benicio isn’t there. He’s not coming? Hm, well…Benicio’s handsome but that Diego Castro! She calls Adriana’s attention to him where Jess is over running her hands all over him. Gosh, if only she were tall and glamorous, like Adriana! She starts trying to imitate her, to comedic effect.
Vale asks the priest to hear her confession…and eeeeeeeverybody comes over to see what’s going on. The priest thought she would have done that already…but no. So she’d like to do it now. He gets the ball rolling and all the guests join in on crossing themselves. When Vale turns around, they pretend they weren’t paying attention. That gag gets repeated throughout Vale’s confession.
Vale explains that the civil wedding was fake and the other priest is fake and she and Lucas are only getting married for the ratings…because he watches the novela, right? He admits he does. Or he DID, until she and Lucas broke up.
Vale says she loves Lucas. He’s the love of her life and she wants to help him. And if she marries him, the ratings will go through the roof!
So she needs three things. First, can he leave so the fake priest marries them instead? Second, this bunch of chismosas need to NOT find out. And third, how many Our Fathers is she going to have to pray to get forgiveness for this?
Patricia. Miguel. Same old conversation. Patricia’s never going away. Miguel tells her he’s in love with Miriam. Once again, I’m glad Miriam doesn’t have a pet.
Nope, Pati doesn’t buy it–she thinks he’s lying about being in love with Miriam to get her to go away. She draws him in again, talking about how she knows he still has feelings for her, kisses him, and walks out.
Patricia goes to Feli’s studio to tell her she can’t go on with this. Miguel is part of her past and she can’t hurt him. Like Feli cares! Either Patricia keeps up her part of the bargain or her son will find out.
The fake priest starts off by saying Lucas had better behave himself. They all know how he is. So he doesn’t bore them, he’s not going to go through the whole script…they already know the bits about richer, poorer, health, sickness, and together until death do they part. And he hopes that’s not for a very long time! He declares them husband and wife–and let the party begin!
Wait! Lucas wants to say a few words. Salma gasps and tells Gabe he’s a psychopath! “You just noticed?”
I want to talk to you about Vale. An incomparable woman who came into my life like a hurricane and swept me up ahead of her…because that’s how it was, literally! She took me by surprise, without announcing herself. She came into my life with all her energy and her incomparable joy and in one second she became indispensible. I can’t imagine my life without her joy, without her optimism, without her affection, without her care, without her unconditional love, without everything she is, without everything she’s made me. For all of that–thank you, Vale.
Natalia starts applauding and everyone crowds around to congratulate them. Agustín, Diego, and even Ignacio all look moved to tears. Gabe snarkily tells him that was nicely done…when did he put the drops in his eyes? Lucas says they’re not drops, he’s really moved. He pulls himself together and wipes his eyes.
Conga line. Eloisa grabs Salma and makes her join in. Vale and Tomás grab Gabe.
Vale slow dances with Lucas. Tomás cuts in. Salma dances with Lucas. I believe what she mouthed was “I hope you’re happy,” and not in the good way. Diego dances with Adriana. Carlos dances with Eloisa.
Vale tosses the bouquet and Jess does this tremendous dive for it and nearly takes down Eloisa in the process. Diego looks a little disgusted with her as she dances around. At some points, Adriana looks disappointed…at others, she looks like she can’t help laughing.
They cut the cake as flashbulbs go off.
Vale and Lucas are off to the hotel. In the lobby, Vale gives Carrizo the same story Lucas did, about having to go back for the bouquet.
Vale’s impressed with the suite. Lucas explains it got comped–it’s good publicity for the hotel to have him spending his wedding day there. He takes a bunch of selfies to upload and tells Vale not to be jealous–he’ll take some with her later.
Lucas tries to interest Vale in some of the complimentary champagne, but she insists she doesn’t drink.
Tomás is so glad Gabe was keeping an eye on him and brought him home. He didn’t want to be around any of the Locas. He doesn’t want to hear them talking about the wedding as if it were real and saying good things about Lucas.
Gabe proposes they stop talking about Lucas and have a real man-to-man talk: pizza or hamburgers?
In Vale’s bedroom, Gabe surveys the mess, looking for a game Tomás asked him to get. He pulls the picture of Lucía down from the shelf and hugs it. He remembers having sex with her.
Tomás comes in and asks why Gabe’s holding his mom’s picture. He wants the truth. Gabe doesn’t lie about anything, but he has his own version–he met Lucía when she was dating Lucas, she was wonderful, and he got all emotional because looking at her picture made him think of Tomás. Tomás knows that Gabe would love to have been his dad.
Tomás asks if Lucas was in love with his mom. Gabe says he was, in his own way. And was Gabe in love with her? Gabe says it was impossible not to be.
She’s home and she’s cranky. Auggie can’t see what the big deal is. Lucas had a fake bachelor party, a fake wedding, and his wedding night will be…uh, fake. (Oh yeah, very convincing.) Salma hopes this whole thing worked.
She starts calling for Carmen, but Rodrigo comes downstairs and says Carmen left already. No, she didn’t leave him alone–she left him with his dad.
Salma and Agustín freak first and ask questions later. Rodrigo has to stop them before they can call the police so Nicolas can tell them he’s out on parole. And Rod says he’s staying with them.
Eloisa makes Carlos a cup of coffee. He’s noticed she’s kind of distant and wants to know why. Eloisa thinks about Felicitas and her threats and says she’s made a decision–they’re going to break up.
Adriana and Natalia are home. Natalia brings Adriana her headache pills before going up to rest–her feet are killing her from all that dancing! But first she’s gotta say–that bouquet was totally Adriana’s. She was robbed!
The doorbell rings and Adriana tells her to go on–she’ll get it. Her dad probably forgot his keys.
Nope, it’s Drunk Diego, stumbling in to ask her the question that’s on his mind: Is his brother’s sister his sister? (Damn, dude, how about some back story?!)
Casa Jess and Miriam
Vale calls Jess and Miriam. She caved on that champagne. She describes the room and the bathroom with its month worth of complimentary toiletries. They tell her to steal them some shampoo. And have fun and drink the champagne! Vale’s going to take their advice–she gulps down the rest of the glass.
After they get off the phone, Miriam gets a text and says she’s gotta go. Oops, but Miguel is here to take her out. Awkward.
Lucas comes out of the bathroom in a red satin robe and tells Vale the wedding and honeymoon might be fake, but she’d better prepare herself for the wedding night! He drops the robe and Vale covers her eyes. Um…maybe that wasn’t the best way to sell it, dude!