La Piloto Tuesday 3/14/17 #6

Zequi wanders out of the ranch house, griping about women. Oscar, seeming a little drunk, waves his gun around and says he told John and Zequi working with women was complicated. Zequi agrees it is.


Yolanda tells Amanda and Lizbeth about her exciting day yesterday. She’s decided she’s done with the Lucio brothers. Amanda thinks that’s going to be difficult when Yolanda and John are mutually crushing on each other.

Yolanda denies she has feelings for anyone. She’s just going to keep working, running packages for Zequi, and when she has enough money she’s going to go get her aunt and take her away somewhere the Lucios don’t have so much influence. Lizbeth likes the idea of disappearing.

She starts to tell them about the drop in New York, but Monica walks in with a bunch of agents behind her. They parade into Zequi’s office and Monica informs him this is an allanamiento (raid). Zequi hits a button on his computer and by the time he stands up with his hands up there’s a message on his screen–he probably just wiped all the incriminating evidence.

The cops raid other businesses, like the catering company, while the news reports that a large ring of companies is being raided, but Centro América air is only being “informally” investigated. On camera, Zequi denies any connection to drug trafficking and organized crime and asks the government to allow them to continue operating while there’s no proof or any formal charges.

At the ranch, John applauds his performance. But why is Zulima still here? He didn’t ask her to stay–he wants her to go back to work and support Zequi.

She angrily goes off to get dressed and overhears Oscar calling her ugly and making fun of her turban. In the bathroom, she sees one of John’s bloody bandages and makes off with it. (¡Ya se armó!)

At the office, the cops are still packing up files. Alberto shows up, pretending to be distressed at the news because he needs this job! Yoli tells him to chill–it’s innocent until proven guilty. Zuli snaps a photo of John and Yolanda standing together.

Once the police have gone, Zequi announces to the assembled employees that it’s a sign they didn’t find anything. They should all just get back to work. Before Yolanda walks off, Alberto asks her if she’s busy tonight (so he can re-bug her phone).


Yoli, Lizbeth, and Amanda are changing out of workwear when Zequi invades the dressing room. Olivia has disappeared and so has the $3M she was supposed to deliver. He reminds Zuli she’s supposed to be keeping track of everybody. And normally, yes, Zuli would know where she is, she just doesn’t at the moment. He gets in a dig about how she was too busy enjoying herself yesterday and warns all of them that if Olivia made off with that money, he’s not sticking up for any of them.

Yoli wonders what Zequi meant about yesterday. Zuli says he’s “crazy.” But what about Olivia–don’t any of them know where she is? Amanda admits she does.

Olivia buys a ticket on the next flight to Madrid on an airline that’s not CAA.

Zuli rushes to catch up with Zequi. “Did you come to apologize to me for screwing John? Was it good?”

“Actually, no.” There’s a long pause before she says she knows where Olivia is. Which makes it a little ambiguous which question she was answering. She tells him Olivia ran off to see her boyfriend in Spain and Yoli offered to go catch her before she leaves. But hey, maybe Yoli and Olivia are both going to take the money and run. Zequi doesn’t respond.

John’s brushing a horse in the stables when Oscar shows up crowing about how Olivia stole $3M of their money to go to Spain and Yolanda’s going with her. (Dude…that’s not…shut up, Oscar!) He’s not waiting for proof, he’s just going to go take care of things. As he walks off we get a close up on the horse’s face. Yeah, even the horse thinks Oscar needs to chill.

John tries calling Yolanda, but she lies and says she’s on her way to the airport to pick up her aunt. Olivia’s not missing–she called in sick. John warns her she’d better not be running off with his $5M. (Me: “How did it go from $3M to $5M in the last five minutes?” Mr. 5ft: “Interest?”)

Zuli spies Alberto and the security guy talking outside. Security guy is convinced Alberto got some good stuff out of Zequi’s office and he’s not sharing.

Yoli finds Olivia at the airport and pulls her out of the security line to ask her WTF she’s thinking! The Lucios would have tracked her down in Spain!

Oscar and his guys get to the airport. He tells them to follow Zulima’s car, but leave Yolanda alive. “She’s mine.” (*roll eyes*)

Inside, Olivia complains about how alone she is. OK, well, if she takes off both she and her boyfriend are going to get killed. Yoli convinces her to come back to CAA and hand over the money and it will be like nothing happened.

Except Oscar’s guys are already inside the terminal. They walk out the other way, Yolanda telling Olivia not to turn around.

Crisis averted

Zequi tells John it was just a little delay–he’s got the money right here in his office. John teases him about Zuli making them sweat, saying Olivia and Yolanda had run off. He’s gotta get his fiera (wild woman) under control!

Funny, Zequi thought as of yesterday John was the one “controlling” Zuli. John laughs it off–if he’d know Zequi was going to be all weird about it, he would have waited for the nurses instead of asking Zuli to stay.

Zequi grumbles that he doesn’t trust Zulima. And what are they going to do about the feds breathing down their necks? Nothing, according to John. But he’s thinking they should get out of town for a while, go to Miami and check on their businesses there.

And you know, he thinks bringing the morras (chicks) in on this was a brilliant idea. He knows they’ve had problems lately, so he wants to do something to make the morras happy. “Like a bonus?” Like a pedota (bigass party). Zequi whines that now is not the time, but John wants to ask them to start working the South American route and he figures after a party none of them will be able to say “no.”

Monica calls Dave. The cops didn’t find jack in the company’s accounting. He’s still hoping that having Yolanda over for dinner will get them some information.

Yoli returns Zulima’s keys and accuses her of siccing Oscar on them. Zuli turns on the waterworks and pouts that Zequi demanded to know if she’d loaned Yolanda her car to go after Olivia. She had no idea this would happen! Gosh, they’re all just so on edge with the messenger business! She never would have brought Yoli to work here if she’d known it was going to run their friendship.

Yolanda reminds her she’s in this because Zuli handed her a suitcase full of money. For which Yolanda is still paying, TYVM! “But I didn’t knooooooow!” She wears Yolanda down with the pouting and the crying and Yolanda agrees they can be friends again.

Later, Zuli works her magic on John. Zequi just got a little honey on his picture, but for John Zuli does an amarre, binding pictures of both of them together with John’s bloody bandage, tying it together with red string, and pouring honey over the whole thing. (*shudder*)


John complains that Yolanda didn’t show up for his party. Zequi says her aunt is in town or something. (Ooh, well-played, Yoli! Now John thinks she was telling the truth yesterday.) Zuli stalks them while Zequi tells John it’s probably a sign Yolanda’s not that into him or she would’ve found a way to be there. Zuli goes over to flirt with John, thanking him for the invitation and saying it’s too bad Yolanda couldn’t be here.

Yolanda’s over at Alberto’s. He admits he can’t cook, but he really wanted her to come over. She says the salad doesn’t look bad. They toast with tequila to her being the first person he’s invited over since his wife died.

Yolanda accidentally-on-purpose tells John Yolanda’s with Alberto. He remembers Yoli thanking Alberto on the plane from Colombia and walks away from Zuli. He asks Zequi where Yolanda’s “aunt” lives before, presumably, leaving to go find her. (So much for that amarre.)

Arley and Amanda run into each other at the party and realize neither of them is quite what they originally claimed to be. She’s not just a flight attendant, she’s also a messenger for the Lucios. And he’s not just “head of security” for some company, he’s an assassin…no, let’s say he’s the Lucios’ “hombre de confianza” (right-hand man).

Alberto fake-casually mentions that the other day at CAA he shared something pretty personal with Yolanda, but he realized he doesn’t know anything about her. Aside from her dream of becoming a pilot. He wants to know everything. Yolanda says “everything” is a lot…but she has nothing to hide.

At CAA, the security guy is telling Yolanda’s disgusting uncle, who now wears his hair flopped over one side of his face, that she’s not there right now. (I know her mother was going to talk!)

Alberto and Yolanda are both tipsy and giggling. If she’d known she was going to have this much fun, she would have taken him out for dinner a lot sooner. Alberto says that’s the sweetest thing she’s said since they met. He dramatically takes her hands and touches her face and starts to move in like he’s going to kiss her….

And then he nervously says he’s got dessert. He made dessert…well, bought dessert…if she likes cream, she’ll love it. Yolanda angrily asks for the bathroom and takes all her stuff with her.

Someone knocks on the door and Alberto opens it to find John and two of his guys standing there. He pretends not to know who John is, but John gives his name easily enough and reminds Alberto he’s probably seen him on the news. He’s here looking for his “girlfriend” Yolanda. Alberto says she’s not there as he turns the picture of himself and his fake wife around (or maybe he really did have a wife, who knows).

At a bar, Monica’s drinking and telling the bartender she’s just “Monica,” not “teniente.” The bartender wonders who she’s crying over. Her husband? Monica says “he” is off having a good time with someone else. She gets a call from Dave, who managed to quickly put through a call, put it on speaker, and put her on mute.

Monica and Yolanda both listen in as Dave/Alberto tells John he didn’t have to show up with these armed men. Like he said, Yolanda isn’t here and he’s not sure why John thinks she would be. Yolanda sneaks into another room as John proposes his guys check out the apartment. Monica calls for backup.

Security guy calls Zuli and passes the phone to creepy uncle. He seems a little suspicious of creepy uncle. Zuli listens, annoyed, as Creepy Uncle takes way too long to get to the point–he’s hoping Zuli can help him find Yolanda. Zuli remembers Yolanda telling her what happened with him. In the flashback, Zuli said it was a good thing he didn’t live around there or she’d cut him to bits with nail scissors and teach him to respect women. She smiles and tells creepy uncle she’d be happy to help him! (…over a cliff? Please?)

Monica’s still listening in as Dave/Alberto claims the bedroom door tends to lock itself when the wind comes in. He takes his time getting the keys and unlocking the door while Yolanda sneaks out the window and makes her way to the neighbor’s balcony.

Monica’s in the car, begging whoever’s driving to find another route if he has to, but they need to get there!

John’s still slowly making his way around the apartment. Dave/Alberto finally tells him he doesn’t usually say this to people he’s just met, but…he’s gay. John and his two henches laugh. Why didn’t he say so sooner? John magnanimously tells him it takes guts to admit it and tells him to “vaya por la sombrita” (take care) before he and his guys leave.

Dave/Alberto checks on his phone, grabs his gun, and goes to tell Yolanda they have to get out of there. From his bedroom window, he sees the cops arrive.

John’s still waiting for the elevator. Monica comes in and has the doorman shut the elevator down. John sends his guys down to see what’s going on as Monica and her team are coming up the stairs. John hears the shooting start and kicks Alberto’s door in, finding him there with Yolanda.

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Author: 5ftLatina

Kat is 5ftLatina. She is really 5' tall (and probably shrinking) and Latina. She is not actually a cactus, but she is both prickly and cute. Mr. 5ft is actually married to Kat, but is not 5' tall or Latina. He is also not a form of plant life.